If I had a style (or just a reason not to live in tees and pj pants)…


So, I’ve always liked things (fashions/bags/earrings) that are not exactly “boring”. I tend to (even when I’m not feeling fat and frumpy) just dress with whatever I can afford, and if I’m not working, and as a severe T-shirt enthusiast, I wear for comfort, not for style. But, when I start to go on all of these websites, and make wish lists (or add to Pinterest), I realize that I really do have a slightly off-beat sense of style- and if I COULD afford it, I might be ABLE to make it work. I have decided that the style I admire most, or would like to emulate aspects of, is Kirsten Vangness, aka Penelope Garcia on ‘Criminal Minds’. I’m fairly certain she brings her own sense of style to the character, as evidenced by photos of her on the red carpet, or other events. She’s not your typical thin starlet, she carries herself well, though, and I admire her wacky fashion sense and the way she confidently wears it. I’m not saying I would go for EVERYTHING, but I’d like to use her as some kind of template….30 is fast approaching. I know what I’d like to wear, and that I could pull certain things off…it just comes to me not being able to justify wearing anything other than pj’s or spend $ on clothes when I have no job. But, maybe one day….

I ♥ Garcia! (PS- had no idea Kirsten Vangness was a lesbian. I kinda wanted her with Shemar Moore in real life!)


My Favorite Quotes- Movies

Just like I posted my favorite TV quotes, these are the movie quotes I had in my notebook. I’ll probably add to this, from time to time…but as of today, here are the movie quotes that I found notebook-worthy:

Movie: Legends of the Fall

Tristan: “I recommend fucking.”

Movie: That Thing You Do

Faye: “Jimmy, from now on, you stay away from me. I’ve wasted thousands and thousands
of kisses on you. Kisses that I thought were special because of your lips and
your smile and all of your color and life. I used to think that was the real you
when you smiled, but now I know that you don’t mean any of it. You just save it
for all of your songs. Shame on me for kissing you with my eyes closed so

Movie: Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade

Indy: “I’m like a bad penny, I always turn up.”

Movie: Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back

Princess Leia: “I love you.”

Han Solo: “I know.”

Movie: A Few Good Men

Col. Jessep: “You want answers?”
Lt. Kaffee: “I think I’m entitled to them.”
Col. Jessep: “You want answers?”
Lt. Kaffee: “I want the truth!”
Col. Jessep: “You can’t handle the truth! Son, we live in a world
that has walls. And those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Who’s gonna
do it? You? You, Lt. Weinberg? I have a greater responsibility than you can
possibly fathom. You weep for Santiago and you curse the Marines. You have that
luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that Santiago’s death,
while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and
incomprehensible to you, saves lives…You don’t want the truth. Because deep
down, in places you don’t talk about at parties, you want me on that wall. You
need me on that wall. We use words like honor, code, loyalty…we use these
words as the backbone to a life spent defending something. You use ’em as a
punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a
man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom I provide, then
questions the manner in which I provide it! I’d rather you just said thank you
and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a weapon and stand a
post. Either way, I don’t give a damn what you think you’re entitled to!”

Movie: Clerks

Customer: “Cute cat. What’s his name?”

Randal: “Annoying customer.”

Movie: Clerks

Dante: “You hate people!”

Randal: “But I love gatherings. Isn’t it ironic?”

Movie: Clerks

Randal: “There’s nothing more exhilarating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there?”

Movie: The Princess Bride

Westley: “As you wish.”

Movie: The Princess Bride

Westley: “There’s a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. It would be a pity to damage yours.”

Movie: Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

Frodo: “How do you pick up the threads of an old life? How do you go on, when in your
heart you begin to understand there is no going back? There are some
things time cannot mend. Some hurts that go too deep that have taken hold. ”

Movie: Cruel Intentions

Kathryn: “You were very much in love with her. And you’re still in love with her. But it
amused me to make you ashamed of it. You gave up on the first person you ever
loved because I threatened your reputation. Don’t you get it? You’re just a toy
Sebastian. A little toy I like to play with. And now you’ve completely blown it
with her. I think it’s the saddest thing I’ve ever heard. Cheers. Tastes good. So I assume you’ve come here to make arrangements. But
unfortunately, I don’t fuck losers.”

Movie: The Wizard of Oz

Dorothy: “But it wasn’t a dream. It was  a place. And you and you and you…and you were there. But you couldn’t have  been could you? No, Aunt Em, this was a real truly live place and I remember  some of it wasn’t very nice, but most of it was beautiful–but just the same all  I kept saying to everybody was “I want to go home,” and they sent me home!  Doesn’t anybody believe me? But anyway, Toto, we’re home! Home. And this is my  room, and you’re all here and I’m not going to leave here ever, ever again.  Because I love you all. And… Oh Auntie Em! There’s no place like home!”

Movie: Glengarry Glen Ross

Blake: “Put that coffee down. Coffee’s for closer’s only. You think I’m fuckin’ with you? I am not fuckin’ with you.”

Movie: The Wizard of Oz

Dorothy: “If I ever go looking for my heart’s desire again, I won’t look any further than
my own backyard, because if it isn’t there, I never really lost it to begin with.”

Movie: The Wizard of Oz

The Tin Man: “Now I know I’ve got a heart, ’cause it’s breaking…”

Movie: Ten Things I Hate About You

Kat: “I hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair.
I hate the way you drive my car, I hate it when you stare.
I hate your big, dumb combat boots and the way you read my mind.
I hate you so much it makes me sick — It even makes me rhyme.
I hate the way you’re always right. I hate it when you lie.
I hate it when you make me laugh — Even worse when you make me cry.
I hate it when you’re not around. And the fact that you didn’t call.
But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you — Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.”

Movie: Titanic

Rose: “A woman’s heart is a deep ocean of secrets.”

Movie: Win A Date With Tad Hamilton

Angelica:  “Well is it love, big love, or great love?”

Pete:  “What do you mean?”
Angelica: “Well, love you get over in two months, big love you get over in two years, and great love, well great love… changes your life. So which one is it? ”
Angelica: “Oh my god, its great love.”
Pete: “Yeah, that just great.”

Movie: Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl

Capt. Jack Sparrow: “The deepest circle of hell is reserved for betrayers and mutineers.”

Movie: Brokeback Mountain

Jack: “Tell you what, we coulda had a good life together! Fuckin’ real good life! Had us a place of our own. But you didn’t want it, Ennis! So what we got now is Brokeback Mountain! Everything’s built on that! That’s all we got, boy, fuckin’ all. So I hope you know that, even if you don’t never know the rest! You count the damn few times we have been together in nearly twenty years and you measure the short fucking leash you keep me on – and then you ask me about Mexico and tell me you’ll kill me for needing somethin’ I don’t hardly never get. You have no idea how bad it gets! I’m not you… I can’t make it on a coupla high-altitude fucks once or twice a year! You are too much for me Ennis, you sonofawhoreson bitch! I wish I knew how to quit you. ”

Movie: Brokeback Mountain

Alma: “Don’t try and fool me no more, Ennis; I know what it means! Jack Twist. Jack Nasty!”

Movie: Stardust

Yvaine: “You know when I said I knew little about love? That wasn’t true. I know a lot
about love. I’ve seen it, centuries and centuries of it, and it was the only
thing that made watching your world bearable. All those wars… pain, lies,
hate… It made me want to turn away and never look down again. But when I see
the way that mankind loves… You could search to the furthest reaches of the
universe and never find anything more beautiful. So yes, I know that love is
unconditional. But I also know that it can be unpredictable, unexpected,
uncontrollable, unbearable and strangely easy to mistake for loathing, and…
What I’m trying to say, Tristan is…I think I love you. Is this love, Tristan?
I never imagined I’d know it for myself. My heart… It feels like my chest can
barely contain it. Like it’s trying to escape because it doesn’t belong to me
any more. It belongs to you. And if you wanted it, I’d wish for nothing in
exchange…no gifts. No goods. No demonstrations of devotion. Nothing but
knowing you loved me too. Just your heart, in exchange for mine.”

Movie: Dirty Dancing

Baby: “Me? I’m scared of everything. I’m scared of what I saw, I’m scared of what I did, of who I am, and most of all I’m scared of walking out of this room and never feeling the rest of my whole life the way I feel when I’m with you.”

Movie: The Dark Knight

The Joker: “Y’see, madness, as you know, is like gravity. All it takes is a little…push.”

Movie: (500) Days of Summer

Summer: “You weren’t wrong, Tom. You were just wrong about me.”

Movie: Chasing Amy

Silent Bob: “You’re chasin’ Amy.”

Holden:  “What? What did you say?”

Silent Bob: “You’re chasing Amy.”

Silent Bob: “So there’s me and Amy, and we’re all inseparable, right? Just big time in love. And then four months down the road, the idiot gear kicks in, and I ask about the ex-boyfriend. Which, as we all know, is a really dumb move. But you know how it is: you don’t wanna know, but you just have to, right? Stupid guy bullshit. So, anyway, she starts telling me about him… how they fell in love, and how they went out for a couple of years, and how they lived together, her mother likes me better, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah… and I’m okay. But then she drops the bomb on me, and the bomb is this: it seems that a couple of times, while they were going out, he brought some people to bed with them. menage e trois, I believe it’s called. Now this just blows my mind, right? I mean, I am not used to this sort of thing. I mean, I was raised Catholic, for God’s sake.
So I’m totally weirded out by this, right? And then I just start blasting her. Like… I don’t know how to deal with what I’m feeling, so I figure the best way is by calling her a slut, right? And tell her she was used. I’m… I’m out for blood. I really wanna hurt this girl. I’m like, “What the fuck is your problem?”, right? And she’s just all calmly trying to tell me, like, it was that time and it was that place and she doesn’t think she should apologize because she doesn’t feel that she’s done anything wrong. I’m like, “Oh, really?” That’s when I look her straight in the eye, I tell her it’s over. I walk….No, idiot. It was a mistake. I didn’t hate her. I wasn’t disgusted with her. I was afraid. At that moment, I felt small, like… like I’d lacked experience, like I’d never be on her level, like I’d never be enough for her or something like that, you know what I’m saying? But, what I did not get, she didn’t care. She wasn’t looking for that guy anymore. She was… she was looking for me, for the Bob. But, uh, by the time I figure this all out, it was too late, man. She moved on, and all I had to show for it was some foolish pride, which then gave way to regret. She was the girl, I know that now. But I pushed her away. So, I’ve spent every day since then chasing Amy… so to speak.”

My Favorite Quotes- TV Shows

        I have been keeping a notebook of quotes that I liked, or related to, since I was about 14. I had a friend that was doing it, and I thought it was a cool idea. Over the years, I’ve added to, and rewritten multiple times, my “Erin’s Quote Notebook”. I’m so OCD and organized that I have them broken down, in the handwritten notebook, by category (and by “TV Show and Episode”, in this case). My goal was to eventually get them all typed. I figured blogging them, by category, would be a good way. Writing by hand, in the age of technology, is extremely overrated! I’ll probably add to this, from time to time…but as of today, here are the TV show quotes that I resonated with (a lot are from the same shows), which, out of context, and if you are not a complete nerd, probably make no sense:

Show: Xena: Warrior Princess; Episode: Prometheus

Gabrielle: “Once, a long, long time ago, all people had four legs and two heads. And then, the Gods threw down thunderbolts, and split everyone into two. Each half then had two legs, and one head. But the separation left both sides with a desperate yearning to be reunited, because they shared the same soul. And ever since then, all people spend their lives searching for the other half of their soul.”

Show: Hercules: The Legendary Journeys; Episode: Stranger and Stranger

Iolas: “You can’t forget the past anymore than you can change it. I guess the trick is to learn from our mistakes, and if we’re lucky, we get our second chances.”

Show: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer; Episode: The Prom

Buffy: “I think horrible is still coming. Right now, it’s worse. Right now, I’m just trying to keep from dying.”

Show: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer; Episode: Lover’s Walk

Spike: “You’re not friends. You’ll never be friends. You’ll be in love till it kills you both. You’ll fight and you’ll shag and you’ll hate each other till it makes you quiver, but you’ll never be friends. Love isn’t brains, children, it’s blood. Blood screaming inside you to work its will. I may be love’s bitch, but at least I’m man enough to admit it.” (*THIS IS ONE OF MY ALL TIME FAVES)

Show: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer; Episode: Passion

Angel: “Passion, it lies in all of us, sleeping… waiting… and though unwanted… unbidden… it will stir… open its jaws and howl. It speaks to us… guides us… passion rules us all, and we obey. What other choice do we have? Passion is the source of our finest moments. The joy of love… the clarity of hatred… and the ecstasy of grief. It hurts sometimes more than we can bear. If we could live without passion maybe we’d know some kind of peace… but we would be hollow… Empty rooms shuttered and dank. Without passion we’d be truly dead.”

Show: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer; Episode: Helpless

Angel:  “I watched you, and I saw you called. It was a bright afternoon out in front of your school. You walked down the steps… and… and I loved you.” Buffy:  “Why?” Angel:  ” ‘Cause I could see your heart. You held it before you for everyone to see. And I worried that it would be bruised or torn. And more than anything in my life I wanted to keep it safe… to warm it with my own.”

Show: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer; Episode: Amends

Buffy: “What about me? I love you so much. And I tried to make you go away. I killed you and it didn’t help. And I hate it. I hate that it’s so hard, and that you can hurt me so much. I know everything that you did because you did it to me. God, I wish that I wished you dead. I don’t. I can’t.”

Show: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer; Episode: Triangle

Buffy: “It hurts. In all kinds of horrible ways. In the way where I’m furious at him … in the way where I blame myself … and all the little ways I imagine … how I could have fixed things….Yes. It has to. I’ll just keep going like I have been, and every day it’ll get a little bit better…But you never know. Maybe he’ll come back. Maybe he’ll hate the jungle … or maybe he’ll want to give it another try. I could … say all the things I didn’t get to say.”

Show: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer; Episode: Becoming, Part 1

Whistler: “Bottom line is even if you see ’em coming, you’re not ready for the big moments. No one asks for their life to change, not really. But it does. So what, are we helpless? Puppets? No. The big moments are gonna come, can’t help that. It’s what you do afterwards that counts. That’s when you find out who you are.”

Show: Friends; Episode: The One with the Baby on the Bus

Chandler: “We’ll flip for it, call it in the air.”

Joey: “Heads.”

Chandler: “We have to assign heads to something.”

Joey: “Well, uh…ducks is “heads”, because ducks have heads.”

Chandler: “What kind of scary-ass clowns came to your birthday?”

Show: Friends; Episode: The One Where Ross Finds Out

Ross: “You’re OVER me? When were you UNDER me?”

Show: Angel; Episode: Reprise

Darla:  “Don’t play games with me.”
Angel:  “I’m not playing.  I just wanna feel something besides the cold.”
Angel:  “Why’re you laughing?”
Angel:  “Don’t you feel the cold?”
Darla:  “What’re you doing?”
Angel:  “It doesn’t matter. None of it matters.”

Show: Angel; Episode: Epiphany

Angel: “You saved me. I gave you everything I had left… I am – so sorry…I am sorry, Darla. You saved me. Sorry I couldn’t do the same for you…And it was perfect, Darla. – It was perfect despair. And you were the reason. You’ve always been the reason. You were the thing that made me what I am, and – I thought – if I could save you, I’d somehow – save myself, but – but I was wrong. And when I failed… when I failed, you saved me. And I have to thank you for that. There is nothing I can do for you now, Darla. I can’t even hate you.”

Show: Friends; Episode: The One Where Heckles Dies

Chandler: “And now I have to get a snake…If I’m gonna be an old, lonely man, I’m gonna need a thing. Y’know, a hook; like that guy on the subway who eats his own face. So I figure I’ll be  crazy man with a snake! Y’know, Crazy Snake Man! And I’ll get more snakes, call  them my babies, kids won’t walk past my place they will run! “Run away from  Crazy Snake Man!!” they’ll shout!”

Show: Friends; Episode: The One Where Ross Finds Out

Rachel: “Ross, hi, it’s Rachel. I’m just calling to say that um, everything’s fine and
I’m really happy for you and your cat who, by the way, I think you should name
Michael. And, you know, ya see there I’m thinking of names so obviously, I am
over you. I am over you and that, my friend, is what they call closure.”

Show: Angel; Episode: I Will Remember You

Buffy:  “So, then let’s just stick to the plan.  Keep our distance until a lot
of time has passed, and given enough time – we should be able to..”
Angel:  “Forget.”
Buffy:  “Yeah.  –  So – I’m gonna go – start forgetting.”

Show: Veronica Mars; Episode: Meet John Smith

Veronica: “Tragedy blows through your life like a tornado, uprooting everything, creating chaos. You wait for the dust to settle, and then you choose. You can live in the wreckage and pretend it’s still the mansion you remember. Or you can crawl from the rubble and slowly rebuild. Because after disaster strikes, the important thing is that you move on. But if you’re like me, you just keep chasing the storm.”

Show: Friends; Episode: The One With the Ball

Monica (re: Rachel’s cat): “So, why don’t you just take it back to where you got it?”
Rachel: “I tried! They won’t take her back.”

Chandler: “Maybe that’s because she’s a minion of the anti-Christ!”

Show: Veronica Mars; Episode: Look Who’s Stalking

Logan: “You know, I’m surprised, Veronica. As a keen observer of the human condition, I thought you saw through people better than that. Bimbos? That’s not me anymore.”

Veronica: “So, what are you like now?”

Logan: “You know, tortured. Ever since I had my heart broken.”

Veronica: “Hannah really did do a number on you, huh?”

Logan: “Come on, you know I’m not talking about Hannah. I thought our story was epic, you know? You and me.”

Veronica: “Epic how?”

Logan: “Spanning years, and continents. Lives ruined and blood shed. Epic! But summer’s almost here, and we won’t see each other at all. And then you’ll leave town, and then… it’s over.”

Veronica: “Logan…”

Logan: “I’m sorry… about last summer. You know, if I could do it over…”

Veronica: “Come on. Ruined lives? Bloodshed? You really think a relationship should be that hard?”

Logan: “No one writes songs about the ones that come easy.”

Show: Veronica Mars; Episode: Of Vice and Men

Veronica: “I think we all learned a valuable lesson about faith. You give it to the people you love. But the people who really deserve it, are the ones who come through even when you don’t love them enough.”

Show: The Office; Episode: A Benihana Christmas

Jim: “You just had a rebound. Don’t get me wrong rebounds can be fun and a nice
distraction. But when they’re over you’re left thinking about the girl you really
like, the one that broke your heart.”

Show: Friends; Episode: The One With Joey’s New Girlfriend

Chandler: “Okay, what do ya say I, uh, go over there and tell her how much I like her? No,
no, it’d be good. I could tell how much I’ve been thinking about her; that I
haven’t stopped thinking about her since the moment we met; that I’m so
fantastically, over-the-top, wanna-slit-my-own-throat in love with her, that for
every minute of every hour of every day, I can’t believe my own damn bad luck
that you met her first!”

Show: CSI; Episode: Bodies in Motion

Catherine: “The best thing about a fantasy is the possibility it will come true. When that possibility is taken away, it just… kinda… sucks.”

Show: LOST; Episode: Cabin Fever

Ben: “You’ll understand soon enough that there are consequences to being chosen. Because destiny, John, is a fickle bitch.” (*GUESS WHERE I GOT MY BLOG TITLE)

Show: The Tudors; Episode: The Act of Treason

Cromwell: “Sometimes, Your Grace, in order to defeat evil you must learn to consort with the devil.”

Show: The Office; Episode: Grief Counseling

Ryan: “A few years ago my family was on a safari in Africa. And my cousin Mufasa, was
trampled to death by a pack of wildebeests. And we all took it really hard, all of us kind of in the audience of what happened.”

Michael: “Do you want to talk about it anymore?”
Ryan: “Oh, it would probably take me like an hour and a half to tell that whole story.”

Show: The Office; Episode: Money

Jim: “Did I ever tell you why I left Scranton?…Yeah, I didn’t think I had…Well, it was all about Pam…I mean, she was with Roy, and, uh, I just couldn’t take it. I mean, I lost it, Dwight – I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t concentrate on anything…even weird stuff, like, food had no taste. So my solution was to move away. It was awful…and it is something that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy – and that includes you.”

Show: The Office; Episode: Niagara

Jim: “Four years ago, I was just a guy who had a crush on a girl, who had a boyfriend. And I had to do the hardest thing that I’ve ever had to do, which was just to.. wait. Don’t get me wrong, I flirted with her. Pam, I can now admit in front of friends and family, that I do know how to make a photocopy. Didn’t need your help that many times. And, uh, do you remember how long it took you to teach me how to drive stick?”
Pam: “Like a year!”
Jim: “I’ve been driving stick since high school, so… For a really long time that’s all I had. Little moments with a girl who saw me as a friend. And, a lot of people told me I was crazy to wait this long for a date with a girl I work with but I think, even then I knew that… I was waiting for my wife.”

Show: The Office; Episode: Company Picnic

Michael: “I didn’t find a perfect moment, because I think that today was just about just  having today. And I think that we are one of those couples with a long story,  when people ask how they found each other. I will see her every now and then,  and… Maybe one year she’ll be with somebody, and the next year, I’ll be with somebody, and it’s gonna take a long time… And then it’s perfect. I’m in no rush.”

Show: Criminal Minds; Episode: JJ

JJ: “I’m thankful for my years spent with this family, for everything we shared,  every chance we had to grow. I’ll take the best of them with me and lead by  their example wherever I go. A friend told me to be honest with you, so here it  goes. This isn’t what I want, but I’ll take the high road. Maybe it’s because I  look at everything as a lesson, or because I don’t want to walk around angry, or  maybe it’s because I finally understand. There are things we don’t want to  happen, but have to accept. Things we don’t want to know, but have to learn. And  people we can’t live without, but have to let go.”

Show: The Vampire Diaries; Episode: Graduation

Damon: “But you know what I really am? Selfish. Because I make bad choices that hurt you. Yes, I would rather die than be human. I’d rather die right now than spend a handful of years with you only to lose you when I’m too old and sick and miserable and you’re still you. I’d rather die right now than spend my last final years remembering how good I had it and how happy I was. Because that who I am and I’m not going to change. And there’s no apology in the world that encompasses all the reasons that I’m wrong for you.”

Elena: “Fine then I’m not sorry either. I’m not sorry that I met you. I’m not sorry that knowing you has made me question everything, that in death you’re the one that made me feel most alive. You’ve been a terrible person. You made all the wrong choices and of all the choices that I’ve made this will prove to be the worst one but I am not sorry that I’m in love with you. I love you, Damon. I love you.”

Top Ten ‘Girl Crushes’

This is the 3rd in my series of “Top Tens”. In no particular order, I bring you my Top Ten Girl Crushes. See the end for an “honorable mention”, too. And ladies, you know you all have them…that famous girl you want to be like (or BE…if you’re super creepy), or just want them as your best friend. Here are mine.

Definition: Girl Crush- feelings of admiration and adoration which a girl has for another girl, without wanting to date said girl. A nonsexual attraction, usually based on veneration at some level. (urbandictionary.com)

Let me just start by stating (just in case you weren’t sure haha) that I am a completely heterosexual woman. My father may wonder, since I rarely tell him about anyone I’ve ever “seen” (i.e. NOT date, just hook up with). He bases my entire adult dating experience on the two men he knows about, that were “boyfriends”. They happened to be complete scumbags. So, of course, he told me so, and likes to remind me when given the chance. I don’t dispute this. The fact that I do not want children (again, not a shocker- I’ve said it since I was 18), nor do I feel the need to be out searching for a husband really kills him, too. I’m starting to conclude that he may think I’m a lesbian, because I also live in pj pants and tees (since I don’t work). He’s mentioned to my mom how much weight I’ve gained. I have 3 cats. I don’t exactly blame him if he does wonder. But I’ll just rather him ponder that, than telling him the alternative (Can you imagine; “Dear Daddy, I can get laid kind of whenever I want cause I’m a girl and I have giant boobs and a vagina. It’s easier than dating and there are no strings attached. Sometimes, your daughter can kind of be a ho. Love, Erin”). That said, I do have a litany of non-sexual “girl crushes”, as I think many of the ladies out there do. Something in them resonates with us-  they are relatable.

Lucy Griffiths-

I have been in total girl crush mode over Lucy since I started watching the BBC show ‘Robin Hood’ a few years ago. I liked her because she was really  pretty, but wasn’t insanely skinny or fake looking.  She has a face that is beautiful, but isn’t emaciated. When she joined ‘True Blood’, I was so excited. I was actually able to watch her on real (not downloaded from England) TV. Then, they paired her with Alexander Skarsagaard on the show, so I really wanted to live vicariously through her. As much as I do not want children, Lucy is one of my favorite names a girl. Her British accent just makes her even more fantastic.

Christina Hendricks-

How can you not love her? I don’t watch ‘Mad Men’, but she is absolutely stunning. When the New York Times called her “big”, her husband wrote back in response. She has stated that she has curves and books, and she loves her body. Rock on! It’s comforting to the rest of us with ginormous boobs and the knowledge that we will never be “skinny”, even at a healthy weight. Curves are sexy!

Venus (as depicted by Botticelli)-

Obviously, this probably seems weird, but the Renaissance painters did not portray their women (or goddesses) as thin, perfect angelic beings. In the Renaissance, women were revered for their curves and their natural bodies. Look at Venus, she has a bit of a round stomach, hips and thighs. This is how Sandro Botticelli envisioned the most beautiful of the Roman Goddesses (Aphrodite, in Greek mythology)- as an imperfect woman. A woman’s body was celebrated, not criticized.

Princess Aurora/Briar Rose (Disney’s ‘Sleeping Beauty’)-

(Side note: the pic to the left is by a digital artist who recreated the Disney Princesses as “real” women. Thought it was neat.)

This is the first girl crush I’ve ever had. Since I can recall, I have been a complete ‘Sleeping Beauty’ devotee. I just remember, even at 4 years old, thinking she was so beautiful with her blonde hair, and pink dress. I had dark brown/black hair and I just wanted to be a princess and wear that pink dress or the cottage dress and dance in the woods with Prince Phillip. I still count ‘Sleeping Beauty’ as one of my favorite movies, and though I’m about to be 30, I have a whole little section of my room, devoted to ‘Sleeping Beauty’ things I’ve collected over the years (this whole Disney Princess revival wasn’t around when I was a kid/teen…I had to search for the things I have). Aurora was, and still is my absolute favorite girl’s name. Too bad I’m not having kids 😉 I’ll just have to have cats named Lucy and Aurora.

Kat Von D-

I think Kat is hot, in a bad-ass way. I don’t think her personal life is all that interesting (ew, Jesse James), but she is just a cool chick, that has proved that tattoos aren’t necessarily a BAD thing. Sure, I’d never get as many as her (or on my face), but she wears her skin well, and she is an amazing artist, too. She’s self-sufficient, runs her own business, and looks stunning.

Britney Spears (circa 2000-2001)-

Oh, Britney. Oh, Britney….I loved you so much. I saw you in concert twice. I even saw ‘Crossroads’ in the theater (and own the DVD). I still want to love you. But when you wore that nude sequined outfit at the VMA’s…I wanted to be you. I wished I had a body like that. Though I wasn’t a fan of the snake the following year, I still had a girl crush. And then…that Vegas marriage to the random guy, then Kevin Federline, two kids in like one year, a shaved head…ohhhh, Britney. I know she’s started getting herself back together, and she has a fiancée who seems like a good influence. But I just loved early 2000’s VMA Britney. I feel like it all went downhill after the Justin Timberlake break-up….

Kristen Bell-

I find her to be adorable. Veronica Mars is one of my favorite characters and one of the (in my opinion) greatest TV shows of all time. Kristen Bell is a huge animal advocate, she is funny and pretty- without looking fake. She is in her 30’s and looks 20. The video of her crying when her boyfriend, Dax, surprised her with a baby sloth was absolutely fantastic. I just want to be best girl friend’s with Kristen Bell.

Keira Knightley-

I saw a movie YEARS ago on TV called ‘Princess of Thieves’. It starred Keira Knightley (and a very unrecognizable, long-haired Stephen Moyer- aka Bill on ‘True Blood’). I just thought she was very pretty and had a lovely accent (I’m a sucker for accents that aren’t creepy). I loved when she was in ‘Love Actually’, and of course, alongside one of my man-crushes, Orlando Bloom, in the “Pirates of the Caribbean’ trilogy. My girl crush was further solidified when she starred in ‘Atonement’ (I had read the book years ago).  Basically, I will see anything she stars in. I think she is a tremendous actress and dazzling, to boot.

Liv Tyler-

Liv Tyler has been so enchanting to me, since she first starred in ‘Crazy’, the Aerosmith video. Next was ‘Empire Records’. I remember thinking that (back when I was in 7th grade in 1995) Liv Tyler was what I wanted to look like when I got older. And, the fact that she was part of the ‘Lord of the Rings’ trilogy just made her even more likeable, to a geek like me. In twenty years, she barely looks like she’s aged.

Dita Von Teese-

The Marilyn Manson marriage aside (he’s so creepy)- Dita is fabulous. She’s perfected the burlesque/pin-up girl image. She makes sex look classy. I wish I had a waist that size. I admire any woman who is content with herself. I would love to see one of her shows. I read her coffee table book she wrote, and I just think she’s a girl to be reckoned with.

Honorable Mention (Gay Man Crush)

Neil Patrick Harris-

He plays straight better than most straight guys. He can sing, dance, act, host….and you can tell that he is in a happy relationship and loves his partner and their children. It was very interesting that they both are the father of one of each of their twins, but don’t want to know which one. The fact that he (and even his partner, David Burtka) can mock his persona in the ‘Harold and Kumar’ movies, just shows how incredibly tongue-in-cheek he is, and the fact that he is gay just makes him, somehow, more appealing to me!

Top 10 “I Dare You NOT to Cry” TV Moments (in my humble opinion) *SPOILER ALERTS

This is the second of my self-imposed TOP TEN Lists, which I started with TV kisses. Now, of course, it’s time to depress myself and delve into the Top 10 “I Dare You NOT to Cry” TV moments. In no particular order, my choices (and the clips). Get a tissue (or a box)…

Alaric’s “Death”, “The Vampire Diaries”, ep: “Do Not Go Softly”. The scene outside of the tomb was too much for me. I sobbed like a giant baby. For a good hour. After it was over. The Fray’s “Be Still” is hauntingly appropriate.

Buffy has to kill Angel, “Buffy: The Vampire Slayer”, ep: “Becoming, Part 2″ * I used this as one of my top kisses, but what follows, Buffy’s realization that she must killing Angel to stop the porthole from opening, and the aftershock reduces me to tears every time. Just watch, as Sarah McLaughlin’s “Full of Grace” plays.

http://youtu.be/zTgHyYDSH6g (it’s about 7 min in…)

Guy of Gisbourne kills Marian, “Robin Hood”, ep: “A Good Day to Die/We Are Robin Hood”. I was in disbelief that they killed her off, and refused to believe it until the next season. She was one of my favorite characters, ever, and her deathbed wedding just breaks my heart.


Charlie dies, “LOST”, ep: “Through the Looking Glass”. There were A LOT of deaths on “LOST” over it’s 6 season run. Boone’s was the first where you realized no one, not even a main character, was safe. But, Desmond kept telling Charlie he saw visions of his death. I figured they played it up too much to actually do it. Still, Charlie sacrifices himself to blow up one of the Dharma Stations, and gives Desmond one final message, ‘NOT PENNYS BOAT’.  When he does the sign of the cross before drowning- KILLER.


Denny dies, “Grey’s Anatomy”, ep: “Losing My Reigion”. I wasn’t a huge fan of the show, or of Izzie. I stopped watching completely by the 4th season. But Izzie’s realization that Denny is really gone after Alex tells her “It’s not Denny, not anymore”, is searing. 


Dr. Greene dies, “ER”, ep: “On the Beach”. I would watch this show periodically, but what always reminds me of this episode is the sound of my sister in her room when she was like 15, unbeknownst to us watching it, and loudly, hysterically sobbing. We thought her boyfriend had broken up with her. The funeral scene, with the old colleagues and the current, is touching.


Desmond contacts Penny, “LOST”, ep: “The Constant”. I know this is my second ‘LOST’ choice, but this whole scene is just amazing, and I cry every time .


Agent Emily Prentiss “dies”, “Criminal Minds”, ep: “Lauren”. For a show that deals in death, this was the first member of the team to “die” (though, of course, she didn’t, but only Hotch and JJ knew that)- the look on the face of the team when they (don’t even have to) hear the news, clinched it.


Logan tells Veronica how they were supposed to be “epic”, “Veronica Mars”, ep: “Look Who’s Stalking”. This is one of my absolute favorite TV quotes, from one of my absolute favorite TV characters. I always had a thing for tortured guys.


Buffy promises not to forget, “Angel”, ep: “I Will Remember You”. Angel is turned back to a human, but loses his ability to save others- so he sacrifices what could have been with Buffy- knowing that she’ll have no memory of it. Only he will.


***Addendum- as this was written before the latest TV season began (2012-2013), I will be adding to this:

Damon talks to Alaric’s grave, “the Vampire Diaries”, ep: “Memorial”. The vampire that never cares, that lost his best friend (who he also killed a bunch of times)- Ric was Damon’s heterolifemate. I’m still pissed about last season. But listening to Damon’s monologue as he’s holding back tears just broke my heart.


Lady Sybil Branson (nee Crawley) dies after delivering a baby girl, in “Downton Abbey”, ep: “Series 3; episode 5”. She is supposedly “cleared” of all “complications”- then, she begins seizing in the middle of the night, and dies of Eclampsia at 24 years old, leaving her whole family, the servants, and her ex-chauffer hubby, Tom, wrecked. I dare you not to bawl.


Opie sacrifices himself for Jax, Tig, and Chibs after one of them is forced to fight to the death on “Sons of Anarchy”, ep: “Laying Pipe”. The funeral itself was a sobfest, but watching the SOA seeing the brother killed before their eyes, powerless to stop it- gutwrenching. “I got this”- Opie.


Gary Time (Don’t Let it End)

Attention:  MTV, and the creators of ’16 & Pregnant’ and ‘Teen Mom’:

I have a message, and I need to be heard. Actually “we” have a message. And by “we”, I mean the legions of fans that are coming to terms with the fact that the original ‘Teen Mom’ series is ending. This last and final season has already been filmed, and although we can read about these mom’s exploits in future tabloids or US Weekly, I’m sure, there is one thing that I cannot accept. The end of ‘Teen Mom’ means that the greatness that is Gary Shirley will no longer grace my TV. No longer will we get to watch him stand idly by as Amber calls him names and verbally (and physically) abuses him. Luckily, Amber (whose stint in rehab REALLY did her well, since she is now serving 5 years in jail) is no longer a problem for Gary- at least not until she gets out of jail. But those of us that are loyal Gary-timers want to follow our favorite XXXXXXL Former-Teen Dad as he attempts to raise his daughter alone (which, he basically does already- or hands her off to his mom). We want to see more of his attractive family, like his step-dad.  For the love of Gary, give him his own show. You know he could use the money, cause, let’s be honest, what kind of job is he going to get? Although, he IS a talented guitar player/singer (see his video of “Amazed”, the Lonestar song), so maybe he could pursue a career in music. Basically, Gary is staple of television viewing. We saw him during Amber’s ’16 & Pregnant’ episode, where he bought a $300 PlayStation, even though he was an expectant father with little income.  We saw him get kicked down the stairs (“Watch your step!”) by Amber, while he was carrying a TV. We saw him buy an engagement ring for $20 at Wal-Mart, and ask about the return policy. We saw him question his relationship with Amber after meeting a single mom in the diaper section of Wal-Mart. (Maybe he could work at Wal-Mart). No other Teen Mom/Dad has had their own line of T-shirts. Gary does! You can’t just take Gary away from us. It would be leaving a Gary-sized (and that is BIG) hole in the hearts of women everywhere. Please, just think about it- I’m not ready for Gary time to end.

Dear Charlaine Harris (and whoever is penning for Lilian Jackson Braun)…

I am a huge fan of Charlaine Harris’ “Southern Vampire Mysteries” book series aka “The Sookie Stackhouse Novels” aka the “True Blood” Books.  I started reading them in April of 2010, after learning that “True Blood”, the TV show, was based on the books (though it only uses certain elements/characters- it really is two separate entities). I just finished the most recent novel (Deadlocked), and I was fairly underwhelmed. I felt that way about the previous one (Dead Reckoning), too. I read the first 9  books within a month, because they were already out when I was beginning to read them. However once I was caught up, she only releases one new Sookie novel a year, so I have to wait. So, I don’t know if it’s because I’m reading it, as the season of “True Blood” is currently airing (even though, as previously stated, they are vastly different). Maybe it’s just TOO MUCH “True Blood” at the moment. I know Charlaine Harris doesn’t have a ghostwriter, which a lot of series end up having, but I know that there is only one book left in the series (to be published in 2013). It almost seems like the mysteries are getting to be too easily solved and just written off, and that the characters are just not as entertaining as they once were. I am hoping that the final book ties the world of Bon Temps up in a nice little finalized bow, that leaves fans satisfied. Regardless, the TV show is awesome on its own level. I think I should reread the books before the final one comes out, and maybe if I read them ALL in succession- not 9 in a month…then one a year… maybe I’ll see it differently. I own the short story collections, and the official companion to the series, as well. I love these books, so I hate feeling disappointed. This shouldn’t be a giant crisis for me, but I was a huge fan of Lilian Jackson Braun’s “The Cat Who…” mystery series. These books I started reading in 8th grade, and continued into my 20’s. However (I later found out it was being ghost written under Ms. Braun’s name because she was too old to continue writing them, although she was the original author and creator), the more recent books in the series were insanely underwhelming, and as much as I wanted to enjoy them, I didn’t. The last book that was published was almost a slap in the face to long-time readers as certain characters were callously dismissed and the beloved main character, Qwill, was barely the same person I had grown to adore (I even had Tom Selleck pictured in my mind as Qwill, if a movie was ever made). To make matters worse, no other books have been published in this series- so if the last book was IT, I feel that long time fans were gypped. I own every companion book to this series, as well, and it was a big part of my teenage/adult life, as far as books go. I would hate to see the same thing happen with Charlaine Harris’ series. Maybe after writing so many books, the author’s run out of ideas, or simply crank out books to fulfill their contractual obligations. But, please think of the fans that have grown to love the characters and the world you have created, and do right by us. Books are a wonderful escape, and the excitement of knowing that a new one is coming out, and is going to bring you back again to visit that other world is a thrill. Don’t let the fans down. I know no true fan will ever be totally satisfied, but at least give it the love that the audience deserves. We can feel when you put your heart in to it.


Just incase anyone that reads this blog is interested:

“Southern Vampire Mysteries” series: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Southern_Vampire_Mysteries

“The Cat Who…” series: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Cat_Who#Novels

Any chance I could get those lost hours of my life back, please???

I mean NO OFFENSE to anyone (or in my case, everyone I know that is reading/has read) regarding the FIFTY SHADES trilogy, but I gave it a chance. I read all 3, and I was pretty vocal on my disdain starting with the first one…and having finished the third, I can without a doubt say that these may be THE WORST books EVER (making the ‘Twilight’ saga- sorry again, Twilight lovers- look like Shakespeare). I was literally rolling my eyes in disgust (and NOT at the redundant sex scenes, which were just insanely ridiculous)…but at the terrible writing, and dialogue and “plot.” Maybe I just don’t get it. I’m totally ok with that. (Also, whoever has my copy of book one- luckily my sis bought them all- can keep it, or loan it or whatever). Maybe I’m just not easily shocked when it comes to poorly written ‘erotic’ (and I use that term loosely) scenes. Or, maybe I’m a cynic and I don’t see the ‘love story’ in the books that other people see. But I (painstakingly) read them all, so I can at least state my opinions having read this overrated garbage. That’s just this critic’s opinion 😉 And, end rant.
(However, I DID read that both Ian Somerhalder (Damon on ‘Vampire Diaries’) and Alexander Skarsgaard (Eric on ‘True Blood’) were interested in the part of Christian for the (destined to be a hit, even though the story is crap) movie version. I will freely admit that if either of them do play the part, I will illegally download the movie and watch it. I’m not above breaking the law (cause I’m not going to spend $10 to see it in theaters). Just sayin’).
On a similar note- I have no interest in ‘Magic Mike’, either. Yes, Channing Tatum is hot. Guys gyrating in G-strings- laughable, not sexy. For my 18th birthday my best friend and I went to “The Cave”, the (now defunct) male strip club in Philly. It was hilarious. But nothing sexy about a guy thrusting his junk in a patriotic G-string to “Always” by Bon Jovi. I guess I’m just jaded. Or doing a good job convincing everyone I’m a lesbian (I’m NOT). But in some cases, less does NOT equal MORE.

Top 10 TV Kisses (in my humble opinion) *SPOILER ALERT

As a Pop-Culture/Entertainment enthusiast, I often see (esp on the EW.com website) list of the top # of whatever for whatever….so I’ve decided to do my TOP TEN Lists, starting with TV kisses. In no particular order, my choices (and the clips). Some make me happy, some are just sexy…AND some make me cry-

Ross and Rachel, “Friends”, ep: “The One Where Ross Finds Out”.  You rooted for Ross, then for Rachel. Then, you think they’re just not meant to be, after he tells her she was too late. But the sight of him at the door, in the rain, literally taking her breath away…if only they hadn’t gone on “a break”…


Buffy and Angel, “Buffy: The Vampire Slayer”, ep: “Becoming, Part 2”. Buffy realizes that Willow’s spell to give Angel back his soul has worked, and they can be together. Yeah, for like a second. But still, what a kiss.

http://youtu.be/zTgHyYDSH6g (it’s about 7 min in…)

Robin and Marian, “Robin Hood”, ep: “A Clue? No”. All season their chemistry built, but she was promised to Guy of Gisbourne, and trying to save Robin, the outlaw. But after realizing that she didn’t have to go through with wedding because Gisbourne had lied, we finally got a season long pay-off.


Cassie and Azazeal, “Hex”, ep: “Possession”. I fell in love with Michael Fassbender long before he was becoming famous for being fully naked, by watching this BBC show, which, like “Robin Hood”, most people in the USA hadn’t heard of. Azazeal was BAD NEWS (he’d even killed her best friend), and even though he’d put a spell on her, this scene was just beyond sexy.


Damon and Elena, “The Vampire Diaries”, ep: “Heart of Darkness”. OK, we waited three seasons for this- A REAL, full-on (not because Damon was “dying”) kiss. And it SO paid off. Til stupid Jeremy had to ruin the moment. Cock block! The on-screen chemistry between this real-life couple puts the on-screen chemistry of Elena and Stefan to shame. TEAM DAMON!


Eric and Sookie, “True Blood”, ep: “I Wish I Were the Moon Tonight”. Minus his horrible outfit of gym shorts and a sleeveless hoodie (which was worn for about 3 episodes), Eric coming to Sookie after Bill frees him (out of his own love for Sookie and her happiness) stops your heart. And then we see Alexander Skarsgaard naked and out of that outfit- FINALLY, so SCORE!


Jim and Pam, “The Office”, ep: “Casino Night”. You thought Jim had given up, after Pam rejected his “I love you”. You want to cry, as you see him tearing up. And then, through the eyes of the camera crew, you watch as he makes his move, and all is right, right then. Because you know she was telling her mom that she loved him.


Sawyer and Kate, “Lost”, ep: “I Do”. So hot! I was (til the end) a Kate/Sawyer fan, not a Kate/Jack fan. When Kate realizes Sawyer didn’t tell her that they were trapped, so that she still had hope, you see all of the tension and feelings and pent-up frustration at their situation just come out. In a cage. Sigh.


Veronica and Logan, “Veronica Mars”, ep: “Weapons of Class Destruction”. I remember watching this series right from the start, and slowly starting to like Logan, little by little. When he goes to save Veronica, thinking she’s being abducted, and she responds by kissing him- thereby confusing HERSELF, it only makes it that much more awesome when he grabs her and REALLY kisses her. I wasn’t expecting this, and I rewatched it about 20x that night. The song that plays is “Momentary Thing”, by Something Happens.


Chuck and Blair, “Gossip Girl”, ep: “War at the Roses”. Chuck and Blair had already been there, done that a bunch of times. But it was the fact that they had been so consumed in destroying each other, so as not to deal with their pain, that just lights this kiss on fire.


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