Top Ten ‘Girl Crushes’

This is the 3rd in my series of “Top Tens”. In no particular order, I bring you my Top Ten Girl Crushes. See the end for an “honorable mention”, too. And ladies, you know you all have them…that famous girl you want to be like (or BE…if you’re super creepy), or just want them as your best friend. Here are mine.

Definition: Girl Crush- feelings of admiration and adoration which a girl has for another girl, without wanting to date said girl. A nonsexual attraction, usually based on veneration at some level. (urbandictionary.com)

Let me just start by stating (just in case you weren’t sure haha) that I am a completely heterosexual woman. My father may wonder, since I rarely tell him about anyone I’ve ever “seen” (i.e. NOT date, just hook up with). He bases my entire adult dating experience on the two men he knows about, that were “boyfriends”. They happened to be complete scumbags. So, of course, he told me so, and likes to remind me when given the chance. I don’t dispute this. The fact that I do not want children (again, not a shocker- I’ve said it since I was 18), nor do I feel the need to be out searching for a husband really kills him, too. I’m starting to conclude that he may think I’m a lesbian, because I also live in pj pants and tees (since I don’t work). He’s mentioned to my mom how much weight I’ve gained. I have 3 cats. I don’t exactly blame him if he does wonder. But I’ll just rather him ponder that, than telling him the alternative (Can you imagine; “Dear Daddy, I can get laid kind of whenever I want cause I’m a girl and I have giant boobs and a vagina. It’s easier than dating and there are no strings attached. Sometimes, your daughter can kind of be a ho. Love, Erin”). That said, I do have a litany of non-sexual “girl crushes”, as I think many of the ladies out there do. Something in them resonates with us-  they are relatable.

Lucy Griffiths-

I have been in total girl crush mode over Lucy since I started watching the BBC show ‘Robin Hood’ a few years ago. I liked her because she was really  pretty, but wasn’t insanely skinny or fake looking.  She has a face that is beautiful, but isn’t emaciated. When she joined ‘True Blood’, I was so excited. I was actually able to watch her on real (not downloaded from England) TV. Then, they paired her with Alexander Skarsagaard on the show, so I really wanted to live vicariously through her. As much as I do not want children, Lucy is one of my favorite names a girl. Her British accent just makes her even more fantastic.

Christina Hendricks-

How can you not love her? I don’t watch ‘Mad Men’, but she is absolutely stunning. When the New York Times called her “big”, her husband wrote back in response. She has stated that she has curves and books, and she loves her body. Rock on! It’s comforting to the rest of us with ginormous boobs and the knowledge that we will never be “skinny”, even at a healthy weight. Curves are sexy!

Venus (as depicted by Botticelli)-

Obviously, this probably seems weird, but the Renaissance painters did not portray their women (or goddesses) as thin, perfect angelic beings. In the Renaissance, women were revered for their curves and their natural bodies. Look at Venus, she has a bit of a round stomach, hips and thighs. This is how Sandro Botticelli envisioned the most beautiful of the Roman Goddesses (Aphrodite, in Greek mythology)- as an imperfect woman. A woman’s body was celebrated, not criticized.

Princess Aurora/Briar Rose (Disney’s ‘Sleeping Beauty’)-

(Side note: the pic to the left is by a digital artist who recreated the Disney Princesses as “real” women. Thought it was neat.)

This is the first girl crush I’ve ever had. Since I can recall, I have been a complete ‘Sleeping Beauty’ devotee. I just remember, even at 4 years old, thinking she was so beautiful with her blonde hair, and pink dress. I had dark brown/black hair and I just wanted to be a princess and wear that pink dress or the cottage dress and dance in the woods with Prince Phillip. I still count ‘Sleeping Beauty’ as one of my favorite movies, and though I’m about to be 30, I have a whole little section of my room, devoted to ‘Sleeping Beauty’ things I’ve collected over the years (this whole Disney Princess revival wasn’t around when I was a kid/teen…I had to search for the things I have). Aurora was, and still is my absolute favorite girl’s name. Too bad I’m not having kids 😉 I’ll just have to have cats named Lucy and Aurora.

Kat Von D-

I think Kat is hot, in a bad-ass way. I don’t think her personal life is all that interesting (ew, Jesse James), but she is just a cool chick, that has proved that tattoos aren’t necessarily a BAD thing. Sure, I’d never get as many as her (or on my face), but she wears her skin well, and she is an amazing artist, too. She’s self-sufficient, runs her own business, and looks stunning.

Britney Spears (circa 2000-2001)-

Oh, Britney. Oh, Britney….I loved you so much. I saw you in concert twice. I even saw ‘Crossroads’ in the theater (and own the DVD). I still want to love you. But when you wore that nude sequined outfit at the VMA’s…I wanted to be you. I wished I had a body like that. Though I wasn’t a fan of the snake the following year, I still had a girl crush. And then…that Vegas marriage to the random guy, then Kevin Federline, two kids in like one year, a shaved head…ohhhh, Britney. I know she’s started getting herself back together, and she has a fiancée who seems like a good influence. But I just loved early 2000’s VMA Britney. I feel like it all went downhill after the Justin Timberlake break-up….

Kristen Bell-

I find her to be adorable. Veronica Mars is one of my favorite characters and one of the (in my opinion) greatest TV shows of all time. Kristen Bell is a huge animal advocate, she is funny and pretty- without looking fake. She is in her 30’s and looks 20. The video of her crying when her boyfriend, Dax, surprised her with a baby sloth was absolutely fantastic. I just want to be best girl friend’s with Kristen Bell.

Keira Knightley-

I saw a movie YEARS ago on TV called ‘Princess of Thieves’. It starred Keira Knightley (and a very unrecognizable, long-haired Stephen Moyer- aka Bill on ‘True Blood’). I just thought she was very pretty and had a lovely accent (I’m a sucker for accents that aren’t creepy). I loved when she was in ‘Love Actually’, and of course, alongside one of my man-crushes, Orlando Bloom, in the “Pirates of the Caribbean’ trilogy. My girl crush was further solidified when she starred in ‘Atonement’ (I had read the book years ago).  Basically, I will see anything she stars in. I think she is a tremendous actress and dazzling, to boot.

Liv Tyler-

Liv Tyler has been so enchanting to me, since she first starred in ‘Crazy’, the Aerosmith video. Next was ‘Empire Records’. I remember thinking that (back when I was in 7th grade in 1995) Liv Tyler was what I wanted to look like when I got older. And, the fact that she was part of the ‘Lord of the Rings’ trilogy just made her even more likeable, to a geek like me. In twenty years, she barely looks like she’s aged.

Dita Von Teese-

The Marilyn Manson marriage aside (he’s so creepy)- Dita is fabulous. She’s perfected the burlesque/pin-up girl image. She makes sex look classy. I wish I had a waist that size. I admire any woman who is content with herself. I would love to see one of her shows. I read her coffee table book she wrote, and I just think she’s a girl to be reckoned with.

Honorable Mention (Gay Man Crush)

Neil Patrick Harris-

He plays straight better than most straight guys. He can sing, dance, act, host….and you can tell that he is in a happy relationship and loves his partner and their children. It was very interesting that they both are the father of one of each of their twins, but don’t want to know which one. The fact that he (and even his partner, David Burtka) can mock his persona in the ‘Harold and Kumar’ movies, just shows how incredibly tongue-in-cheek he is, and the fact that he is gay just makes him, somehow, more appealing to me!

Any chance I could get those lost hours of my life back, please???

I mean NO OFFENSE to anyone (or in my case, everyone I know that is reading/has read) regarding the FIFTY SHADES trilogy, but I gave it a chance. I read all 3, and I was pretty vocal on my disdain starting with the first one…and having finished the third, I can without a doubt say that these may be THE WORST books EVER (making the ‘Twilight’ saga- sorry again, Twilight lovers- look like Shakespeare). I was literally rolling my eyes in disgust (and NOT at the redundant sex scenes, which were just insanely ridiculous)…but at the terrible writing, and dialogue and “plot.” Maybe I just don’t get it. I’m totally ok with that. (Also, whoever has my copy of book one- luckily my sis bought them all- can keep it, or loan it or whatever). Maybe I’m just not easily shocked when it comes to poorly written ‘erotic’ (and I use that term loosely) scenes. Or, maybe I’m a cynic and I don’t see the ‘love story’ in the books that other people see. But I (painstakingly) read them all, so I can at least state my opinions having read this overrated garbage. That’s just this critic’s opinion 😉 And, end rant.
(However, I DID read that both Ian Somerhalder (Damon on ‘Vampire Diaries’) and Alexander Skarsgaard (Eric on ‘True Blood’) were interested in the part of Christian for the (destined to be a hit, even though the story is crap) movie version. I will freely admit that if either of them do play the part, I will illegally download the movie and watch it. I’m not above breaking the law (cause I’m not going to spend $10 to see it in theaters). Just sayin’).
On a similar note- I have no interest in ‘Magic Mike’, either. Yes, Channing Tatum is hot. Guys gyrating in G-strings- laughable, not sexy. For my 18th birthday my best friend and I went to “The Cave”, the (now defunct) male strip club in Philly. It was hilarious. But nothing sexy about a guy thrusting his junk in a patriotic G-string to “Always” by Bon Jovi. I guess I’m just jaded. Or doing a good job convincing everyone I’m a lesbian (I’m NOT). But in some cases, less does NOT equal MORE.
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